If Swearing Burned Calories Mug

If profanity was Pilates, half of us would be supermodels by breakfast.

This chaotic cow gets it. She’s stressed, she’s spicy, she’s one moo away from dropping another F-bomb, and she’s proudly rocking the body of someone who has not gained a single calorie-burning benefit from her Olympic-level swearing.

This mug is for the heifers who swear like it’s a sport, mumble insults under their breath all day long, and would absolutely qualify for the Swearing World Championships if that were a thing (and frankly it should be).

• the office goblin,
• the farmwife with a temper,
• the exhausted mother who swears into her laundry basket,
• or literally anyone whose daily vocabulary could get them banned from children’s birthday parties.

Sip your coffee, embrace your inner feral heifer, and let this mug remind the world that if swearing did burn calories…
You’d be ripped enough to star in your own fitness DVD.

Dishwasher safe, microwave safe, and absolutely not safe for delicate sensibilities.

CARE INSTRUCTIONS